How do I feel about my child’s separation anxiety? Honestly, it’s absolutely one of the most delightful feelings I really enjoy as a mom.

I remember when my son was between 8-9 months old. Just like every mother, I couldn’t forget those moments.

At that time, he often asked for more attention from me rather than from anybody in the house. No matter where he was or who was holding him, as soon as he saw me, he suddenly cried as if he was asking me to hold him.

When I came close to him, he abruptly opened his arms and looked so happy. His cry stopped in a moment. It was truly an unspoken feeling I had experienced.

But there was also time when he acted differently from what I had expected. When I went for work, I thought he would cry hard to see me leaving him. I hugged him tight and kissed his face again and again.

I told him, “Baby, Mommy have to go to work now. Eat and drink a lot, okay? And have a good nap. I’ll be back. Love you much. Bubye.”

Sometimes he kept looking at me when I said so. I expected him to start weeping. But it didn’t happen. I wondered why. I found out later that he was interested with the wheels of the car I traveled in everyday.

Whenever the car started to run, my son always kept his eyes on the wheels. Looking at them spinning must have been very exciting to him. I just smiled, though my heart broke a little. I soothed myself by thinking that it was good for him being curious of strange things.

My son is a baby who has sleeping problem. Throughout the night during his sleep, he often woke up several times. If he woke up and didn’t find me nearby, he would cry out loud, making the whole house panic as if something really bad happen.

When I got into the bedroom, he would crawl toward me, and then I hugged him. He’d be calm afterward. Breastfeeding really worked to put him back to sleep.

Thank God I decided to breastfeed him so that I wouldn’t be engaged with the rush of preparing formula during the night. Yes, I chose to breastfeed him in nighttimes, even though he still got formula in day times.

Maybe this breastfeeding activity had created the bond between us. I enjoyed it, and still until now. This might also what made my son didn’t want to stay away from me.

If your baby or child has the same characteristic as my son has, I’m sure you have the same feeling as I do. If you think that your baby’s cry (for being away from you) annoy you, just remember that it won’t last forever.

Separation anxiety is a phase in your child’s development during his early years of life. Almost all children go through this experience. What I can suggest you is just enjoy these intimate moments before they’re gone along with your child’s growth.

From what I’ve heard from my friends about this, you’re gonna miss the moments. To me, even now, I really don’t want the phase fade away.

Wait, wait. There’s one more thing I’d like to share with you, which you may not think will make your child comfortable. I remember my friend told me that if you’re going somewhere, don’t forget to tell your child that you’ll be back. Instead of sneaking out of the house, waving your hand and saying that you’ll be back will soothe him somehow.

Everyone experiences anxiety. In fact, being unable

to do so can be a sign of a serious psychological

problem. In our hazardous world, anxiety is a

strategy the body uses to help the mind recognize

danger and keep well out of its way. As with most

mental illnesses, it’s not the presence of anxiety

alone that creates problems. It is more about how

severe it is and how much it gets in one’s way of

life or quality of living.
Most people feel anxious at some time in their lives.

However, only about five per cent of people

experience severe anxiety and rarely seek

professional help. Anxiety is a mixture of physical

and mental symptoms. They are part of what

psychologists call the “fight or flight” response.

When the body is under threat it automatically

prepares either to defend itself or run.
Anxiety is a normal reaction to stress. It helps one

deal with a tense situation in the office, study

harder for an exam, or remain focused on an important

speech. In general, it helps one cope with the tasks

and demands of everyday life. But when anxiety

becomes an excessive, irrational dread of everyday

situations, it can become a disabling disorder.
Fortunately, effective treatments for anxiety

disorders are available, and research is yielding new

and improved therapies that can help most people with

anxiety disorders lead productive and fulfilling

lives.
However, studies have shown that having a healthy

diet may reduce signs and symptoms of anxiety.

Although food can’t cure an anxiety disorder,

consider some diet changes and that would benefit a

severely anxious person:
•    Avoid or limit caffeine intake as much as

possible. Caffeine is present in many soft drinks,

not just in tea and coffee and it can set up its own

vicious cycle. It can speed up heart rate and disrupt

sleep — which later on become prevailing signs of

anxiety. Trying to overcome tiredness by drinking

more caffeine only makes the long-term problem worse.
•    Avoid too much alcohol. Similarly, alcohol

can worsen the symptoms of anxiety, and disrupt

sleep. Many people reach for a drink to calm their

nerves, but the consequences of overindulgence can

outweigh the benefits of initial relaxation. For

some, a hangover, insomnia, and dehydration make one

feel worse than before one had a drink. In excessive

amounts, alcohol can actually act as a depressant,

making the drinker feel sluggish or more anxious.

Alcohol, like a simple sugar, is rapidly absorbed by

the body. Like other sugars, alcohol increases

hypoglycemia symptoms. It also causes mood swings.

•    Eat complex carbohydrates, also known as

carbs. During anxious times, turn to comforting

carbs. These foods act as a mild tranquilizer by

increasing the amount of serotonin, a calming

neurotransmitter in the brain. Complex carbs such as

potatoes, wholewheat bread, and pasta take longer to

digest than sugary simple carbs like white bread.

That way, one can stay fuller longer and blood sugar

is likely to stay steady, eliminating stress and

anxiety.
•    Be sure to drink eight or more glasses of

water a day. Dehydration can lead to fatigue,

headaches and stress. One should be well-hydrated and

drinking lots of water a day can decrease symptoms of

anxiety.
•    Take multivitamins and mineral supplements. B

vitamins, whose role is to unlock the energy in food,

are crucial. Vitamin B-6 helps manufacture serotonin

in the brain. Choose a daily supplement that supplies

100 per cent of the daily recommendation of all

vitamins and minerals.
Although tension and daily stresses are unavoidable,

one can relieve tension and manage stress and anxiety

better by watching out for what one eats and what one

does not eat. Remember that a healthy body and a

healthy mind are often one and the same thing.

Redefining Fear

Anxiety fear is an intense feeling of fear produced to an individual despite the absence of any real threat. This type of irrational fear affects even adults and situations that could produce severe levels of anxiety fear can result to panic attack. Therefore, those who suffer from this are recommended to respond or look for proper ways of dealing with the situation since it is potentially dangerous. Aside from that, the person suffering from anxiety attack lack the ability to think clearly or lose connection with reality.

To deal with anxiety fear, a person must realize that he or she has a choice in the way they respond to stimulus of fear. Knowing this will immensely alter and reframe the way you look at fear. Now, you will be able to gain power over your fear instead of being controlled by it. Because if not, then fear always finds a way to create negative impacts on your brain and the way you perceive things. Look at fear in a different light, so that it does not produce the same anxious feeling as it usually does on you.

Symptoms of Anxiety Fear

How do you know you have anxiety fear? Of course, it is important to identify the symptoms for this condition because only then can you make the proper diagnosis and take steps to improve your condition. Here are common symptoms shared by people with anxiety fear:

•    intense sweating
•    feeling of nausea
•    breathlessness
•    incontrollable shaking
•    dry mouth
•    heart palpitations
•    loss of touch with reality
•    inability to think clearly or focus

Treatment Options for Anxiety Fear

As with how you respond to fear, you also have a choice on treatments that will help reduce the symptoms of anxiety fear or get rid of it altogether. Therefore, you are able to respond to situations logically instead of letting the fear consume you. Here are possible options to consider:

Hypnotherapy

The objective of this treatment is to reprogram your subconscious min, which is a contributor in creating those irrational fears. One you have altered that program in your brain, then symptoms are also consequently minimized. If you have any reluctance when it comes to the control of your brain programs, then you have to be assured that hypnotherapy is a safe method. Before you know it, you have let go of some brain programs that produce the high level of anxiety associated with your irrational fears.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming

This method will serve to interpret how you produce your idea of reality. From an analysis of your own constructs, psychological professionals will suggest new ways in which you can create your perspective of the world. This will help you get rid of any form of thoughts that produce anxiety fear.

Energy Psychology

Like with the two treatment methods above, this one is a rapid and effective method. It is built around the same foundation as acupuncture, minus the needles. Instead, this method can be dubbed as emotional acupuncture wherein you change your behaviors and thought patterns, since they have been recognized as effective means to get rid of unnecessary fears in life.

Exercises to Combat Fear

One of the best ways to combat fear is to stop and take time to connect with your body. You can try following the steps below and find yourself free of any anxiety fear:

•    Sit quietly or lie down while you keep your eyes shut.

•    Starting from your feet and working your way upwards, scan your body for sensations.

•    Take time to pause in each area of your body and give notice to the different sensations they undergo.

•    Then, proceed to the center of your body – at the abdomen area or around the navel. Then, breathe into it.

•    Try doing this technique at least once a day and you will notice you will feel relaxed after doing it. Indeed, meditation has been pointed out as one of the most effective methods of healing and you can do the same with anxiety fears.